ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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