Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Mom said you looked used
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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