he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
