Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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