So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
