It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Mom said you looked used
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
