New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
