we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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