Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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