You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
