like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
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