It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
