the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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