My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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