I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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