You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
We left an ass print on the piano.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
