some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
