she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
