i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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