Ambien. No doubt about it.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
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