she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
