I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
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