I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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