I hope mine doesn't look like that
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
As shirtless as possible
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
