worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
