I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
