didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
True college students do jello shots in the library
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