Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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