All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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