just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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