Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
