She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
