i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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