Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
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