I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
