I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Randomize