That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
vagina is talking i cant
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
