Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
