hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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