it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
