this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
