He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
