just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
