It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
