They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
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