remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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