we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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