chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
