You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
