He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
